Letter Read at Porter's Memorial Service

Balloon Release at Spokane Memorial Complied by Darcie Dingmann

Our Dearest Porter,

They say you don’t really realize how much you loved something until it was gone. Since the day you were born we held that thought close to our hearts as we could never imagine a life without you. You were so precious, so perfect and so loved. Now that you are gone the stillness of our house and the pain in our hearts has left an emptiness in our world.

“While we try to teach our children about life, our children teach us what life is all about.” Porter, you taught us more about life than we knew existed. You taught us how the smallest things in life are now the things we cherished most. Our best memories are not of family outings or big events, but rather the simple things. We will forever miss watching Sesame Street with you in the mornings. How you would bring us your shoes and coat early on a Saturday morning because you wanted to go outside. We will miss your constant laughter that filled our house, and the babbling that carried a meaning of it’s own. We will miss how messy our house would get after you would spend an afternoon playing.

We learned that life is not about bills, work or errands, but rather that life is about doing things that make you laugh, being with people you love, and going outside whenever you feel the need. We learned that blocks are not for building perfectly constructed towers, but rather the opportunity to do something fun with someone you love over and over again. We learned that to play is to be messy. We learned that laughter is a sound that fills our hearts. We learned that furry bright-colored puppets can be more entertaining than the evening news. We learned that the simple unstructured time we have with one another leaves more time for the simple things that mean so much in the end. 

We never thought we would lose you. Like most parents, it was a thought that frightened the soul. “We always mark a child’s firsts- first foods, first words, first steps – but lasts often slip by unnoticed.” But we remember the last time we played cars, and you made the cute noise you make as you ran the wheels across the coffee table. The adorable ROAR you gave for the plastic tiger with a huge smile on your face. We remember the last time you held out your empty rocket cup and said so perfectly “all done, no more.” We remember the last time you played with your swimming duck in the bathtub and made his legs swim by pulling on his string. Your giggle filled the bathroom. We remember the last time you streaked through the house after bath time, laughing and screaming with joy. It seemed as though nothing could be more prefect. Mom remembers watching daddy get you ready for bed. He put you in your fire truck pjs and following the nightly routine of lotion on your “arms” and “back,” and a bit of Vaseline on your “nose.” Mommy remembers as she began to read your favorite story Silly Sally that Daddy said “I love you” and waving as you snuggled close to her chest. She remembers the smell of your hair and the warmth of your head. She remembers the last time she laid you down for sleep and the big wet kiss you gave her on her cheek. She remember saying her last words to you “I love you sweetie, goodnight.” It seems that these lasts are more cherished in our hearts.

Your passing has left us saddened and lost. You opened our hearts to a world we could have never imagined, a love waiting to blossom. It is hard to find the strength to move forward but “spring follows winter and just as the daffodils rise to greet a new season,” we will find the strength from our wonderful memories of you to carry on. We will never stop loving you just because you are gone. We will continue to love you forever. You have left your footprints on our heart; and indeed, our soul. You are forever threads in our fabric, memories in our heart, and love in our being. You are now and will always be a living, loving part of who we are.

Love

your mom and dad

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